Soon after quitting my job (late 2010), I launched an eBook that I had been working on: The Two Week Lucid Dreamer. I have been able to generate a small automated monthly income every month since (except the first month of tuning my Google Adsense campaign).

Five Books That Helped Me Get My eBook Right

The Four Hour Workweek was a great starting point, as was Tim’s blog. Both have excellent tips on automating your online business.

How To Launch The **** Out Of Your EBook: If you are interested in launching an eBook, this eBook is a great starting point. Yes, it’s expensive, but it was worth every penny for me… This was a daily go-to resource for me while I was planning and developing my eBook. It had the most detailed information on marketing/launching a successful eBook because it written by people that have walked the walk.

Note: The How to Launch …  eBook does not mention the eBook reader stores (Amazon Kindle Store, Apple IBookstore). A 26 year old woman made $2 million in the last year selling Kindle eBooks for only $2.99 each! eBook readers have become very popular over the last few years. If you research how to publish your eBook to these eBook reader stores before you write the ebook, you will save yourself a lot of time on formatting later. I learned this the hard way! Check out Amazon.Com Kindle Direct Publishing and Smashwords (or scroll down) for more details on formatting an eReader-friendly eBook.

Moonlighting on the Internet: This book helped me determine all the options for me to make an income with the Internet. It covered Information Products, Affiliate Marketing, eBay, E-Commerce Stores, and Blogging. Ultimately, I decided that an Information Product (eBook) was the best option for me.

Mastering Online Marketing: This book helped me get my online marketing (which has always been my weak point) right. It told me exactly how to created an automated online marketing system. Now that I know how it works, I can re-use this system for my other products.

Winning Results With Google Adwords: The first month that I started to advertise my product on Google Adwords, I lost money. This book helped me recoup that money, and tweak my campaigns into fairly automated income generators.

Services I Use To Keep My Online Business Automated

This is a comprehensive list of the services I am using to keep my online business running. There are other options for many of these (ex. ClickBank instead of eJunkie), but I went with the  most affordable service for my type of business.

ServInt (Web Hosting): For $49 / month, I keep all of my websites on a managed dedicated server here. It has been extremely reliable, and I’ve been using them since 2008. If you are only hosting one website, go with a cheaper solution (like GoDaddy web hosting). But if you have several sites, using a service like ServInt makes the most sense.

GoDaddy: All my domains are hosted here, for $12 / year each. GoDaddy has a lot of “extras” that they try to sell you on when you buy a domain. If you just pay for the domains, they are very reasonable.

Google Adwords: This is one source of prospects and customers for my eBooks. I advertise on specific Google keywords using this tool. My monthly budget for Adwords campaigns varies. I lost money when I started, but recouped it after educating myself by reading Winning Results With Google Adwords.

aWeber: My automated e-mail campaigns and e-mail lists are hosted here ($19 / month). The interface is extremely user-friendly, and I know my messages are actually getting to my readers (versus getting flagged as spam by ISPs).

e-Junkie: While my customer payments are actually taken by Paypal, e-Junkie takes care of the shopping cart and digital delivery of my information products ($10 / month).

Amazon.Com Kindle Direct Publishing: Publish your eBook here to get it on the Amazon Kindle Store. Right now Kindle is the most popular eBook reader. Amazon pays you 70% Royalty. HTML format seems to work best (you can export Word Documents to HTML), then import into the free Mobipocket software which outputs a Kindle PRC file.

Smashwords: Publish your eBook to the rest of the eBook reader stores here (Sony eReader, Apple IBookstore, etc). Smashwords pays 85% royalties if purchase is made through their site. Lots of special eBook reader formatting guidelines to follow before they will publish it. Smashwords will convert your MS Word document into other eBook reader formats.

Disclosure: I only recommend products/services that I personally have tried and found useful. I make a small commission on some of the links above. The commission helps support this blog, so if you are interested in any of these products / services, and supporting the blog, please use the links in this blog post.

photo credit: claude.attard.bezzina

photo credit: Tommyvos

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Through a systematic, concrete, and powerful process, Discover Your Dharma reveals the Secrets to know your dharma- what is the right action to take now.
-Shivani Singh, Discover Your Dharma

Discover Your Dharma

As Shivani explains, dharma is taking the right action as it presents itself. In her book Discover Your Dharma: 10 Secrets to Redefine Your Life Purpose Through Effective Journaling, she shares journaling techniques which help you discover your life purpose in the moment.

My Review

Journaling can be a highly effective self-discovery technique. Discover Your Dharma takes journaling to the extreme, using it to help you discover your “life purpose” in the moment, or dharma. Dharma is a more-realistic version of your “life purpose” or “life calling”, as it encompasses your present situation. Knowing your dharma means breaking free from social programming, letting go of external approval, and discovering yourself. Singh’s book is a hybrid of self-help and journaling technique workbook.

The meat of Singh’s book is the journaling exercises at the end of each chapter. These range from stream-of-consciousness journaling to non-dominant hand journaling. Some of the exercises, such as slamming your journal shut and yelling, seemed a little over the top. But overall, I found the exercises very useful. They encouraged left and right brain thinking, helped me get past my habitual journaling style, and helped me to think outside of the box. By following Sing’s exercises, I was able to look at a particular problem in my life with a new perspective.

While the journaling exercises were useful, Discover Your Dharma pre-exercise readings had a bit too much New Age fluff for my taste. For example, one chapter tells you that “everything you are, everything your life is, and everything you have, you have created.” These Law of Attraction-type affirmations are irresponsible and I don’t agree with them (see my post on How Does the Law of Attraction Explain The Holocaust?).

Additionally, a portion of the chapter introductions start by discussing a famous leader from the past (ex. Mother Theresa), and connecting their accomplishments with the chapter exercise. This is interesting early on, but after a few chapters of these, I found myself wanting to jump straight to the exercise at the end of the chapter, versus reading the introduction. Maybe I’ve just read too many self help books!

Compared to other self help and “life purpose” books, the thing I like most about this book is the fact that you are actually taking action after each chapter, and figuring things out for yourself. The book’s focus on journaling provides a lot more opportunity for self-discovery than other books. I would recommend Discover Your Dharma to anyone that is looking for direction in their life and wanting to learn new their journaling techniques at the same time.

Note: The book recommends following the journaling exercises to the Discover Your Dharma CD, but I did not have this, so instead I journaled to my own music selection.

About Shivani Singh

From working with NASA to founding The Journaling Institute, Shivani Singh is a journaling expert and innovator of the Dharma Discovery System. Spiritually grounded, she combines a unique blend of “smarts and hearts”, with ancient wisdom and modern thinking. Pioneering affordable and innovative technologies to improve health and well-being, Singh has developed experiential programs that have transformed thousands globally.

Where to Buy the Book

Discover Your Dharma is available at Amazon.Com.

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Dreams are today’s answers to tomorrow’s questions.

-Edgar Cayce

Upon waking, people typically forget more than 50 percent of their dream content within five minutes. Within ten minutes, 90% is gone. But with practice, many people have learned how to remember their dreams every day. Most of these dreamers would say that remembering their dreams gives them insight that they did not have before. It helps them learn more about themselves, and adapt to changes in their waking life.

“Practice makes perfect” has definitely been the case for me. I used to rarely remember my dreams. Shortly after I started practicing the steps below, I was remembering one dream per night. Now I usually remember 3-4 dreams per night.

Why Remember Your Dreams?

Your brain takes in a lot of information during the day. Your conscious mind is not able to process all of this information while you are awake. When you go to sleep, your dreaming mind has access to this information that was not available to you while you were awake. Your dreams might reveal new insights, desires, or help you solve a problem creatively. If you remember your dreams, you will have access to more self knowledge and might learn more about your true thoughts and feelings.

Famous Dream Inspirations

These famous individuals used their dreams to help them with inspiration:

• Albert Einstein: Einstein’s Theory of Relativity
• Paul McCartney: The Beatles song “Yesterday”
• Mary Shelly: The monster Frankenstein
• Elias Howe: The Sewing Machine

Preparation for Improving Your Dream Recall

• Go to your local bookstore and buy a nice journal which you will devote solely to capturing your dreams. Also purchase a book light which you can clip on to this journal, and a nice pen.
• Place your dream journal, pen, and book light close to your bed or under your pillow
• Tell yourself that when you wake up the next morning, you will remember your dreams

Step 1) Make a conscious effort to remember dreams before you go to sleep

As you’re falling asleep, suggest to yourself that you will wake up remembering your dreams. You can use a mantra (such as “I will remember my dreams”). Instead of putting intentional effort into the suggestion, try to genuinely expect to remember your dreams. Just be careful not to put too much intentional effort into the mantra. Instead, try to genuinely expect to remember your dreams.

Step 2) Upon awakening, stay in bed as long as possible and replay the dream in your mind

It is generally accepted by dream researchers that dreams are not remembered unless the dreamer awakens during a dream. Even after awaking during the dream, it is usually not remembered for long. Therefore, every time you wake up in the night, and the next morning, ask yourself, “What was I just dreaming?”

Stay in the same position and think your dreams over before jumping out of bed. After you have remembered your dream, move to a different position (with your eyes still closed) that you normally sleep in, and try and remember other dreams. The position that you are in may help your brain remember what dream you had while sleeping in that position.

Step 3) Write about the dream in a dream journal

Capture as much detail as possible, including the estimated time of the dream. If you are too groggy when you awake, just jot down a summary, and try to fill in the gaps the next morning.

Your dream recall will improve with time. Before I started capturing my dreams in a dream journal, I rarely remembered them. After using a dream journal for several weeks, I was remembering at least one dream per night, often 3-4.

Other Tips for Dream Recall

• You need at least 8 hours of sleep per night. Most of your dreams will occur during the end of your sleep cycle (REM phase), so you need to ensure you are getting enough sleep to begin this phase.
• Keep your Dream Journal or a notepad with you at all times. It is likely your daily activities may remind you of something in your dream. As you remember these details, write them down immediately.
• Try to go to sleep at the same time and wake up at the same time each day to increase the quality of your sleep

This post is part of the Dream Evolver Series

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You must daily have the courage to risk making mistakes, risk failure, risk being humiliated. A step in the wrong direction is better than staying “on the spot” all your life.

-Maxwell Maltz

There are some activities and jobs in which people must fail every day in order to succeed. Think of the insurance salesman who is turned down 9 times in a row, just to have one success. Or the skateboarder who must fail at performing a new trick many times before he is able to perform it successfully one time. We can learn a lot from these extreme failing individuals- they seem to view failure as a temporary setback, or a learning experience.

Learning from Extreme Failing: Skateboarders

As a high school student, I loved skateboarding. The nature of skateboarding involves a lot of failing- my skater friends allowed themselves to fail much more often than I did, and in doing so, they became great. I’ve pulled together some footage from my high school skateboarding days to give you a visual of extreme failing:

What if a skateboarder fell one too many times, and thought of his failure as a defeat, wallowing in its permanence and pervasiveness? What if he decided he wouldn’t try the same trick again, for months? I can tell you that he wouldn’t get very far in skateboarding with that mindset. To be successful at skateboarding, you must pick yourself up after a failure and immediately start trying again. You must look at a failure as a challenge, or a temporary setback to achieving your goal.

The Extreme Failing Mindset Can be Applied to Any Type of Setback

The extreme failing mindset isn’t just for insurance salesmen and skateboarders- it can help anyone overcome a setback in their life. One example would be if you recently broke up with someone- If you tell yourself “This is only temporary, I will find someone else”, you will be on your way to a fast recovery. But if tell yourself “This person meant everything to me, I’ll never find someone else like them”, you are setting yourself up for depression and pain.

Similarly, if you recently lost your job, and explain it to yourself as “I lost my job because I am lazy and incompetent- no other employer will want to hire me”, you most likely won’t recover and get a new job for a while- the negative mindset will be self-fulfilling. By contrast, if you tell yourself “The economy is not doing well right now so my employer had to make some cutbacks- I tried my best, and now I will find a new job even better than the last”, you will be on your way to finding a great new job.

Three Dimensions of Explaining Setbacks to Yourself

Based on years of research from psychologist Martin Seligman (explained in his book Learned Optimism), there are three dimensions of explaining setbacks to yourself: Permanence, Pervasiveness, and Personalization. On each dimension, you can explain a setback with either the extreme failing (optimist) mindset, or the pessimist mindset:

Permanence: Do you believe the cause of the bad event is permanent or temporary? Extreme failing individuals believe the bad event is temporary.

Breaking up example: Tell yourself “I will find someone else”

Pervasiveness: Do you believe the cause of the bad event is universal, or specific? Extreme failing individuals believe the cause of a bad event is specific.

Breaking up example: Tell yourself “My relationship was only one part of my life”

Personalization: Do you believe the cause of the bad event is your fault (internalize), or other people’s fault (externalized)? Extreme failing individuals believe the bad event is external to themselves.

Breaking up example: Tell yourself “My ex was not the right person for me”

Do You Have the Extreme Failing Mindset? Take the Test

How do you perceive failures in your own life? Take the test to find out how well you handle setbacks, and how much of an extreme failing individual (optimist) you are.

Taking Responsibility

A comment was recently posted by Brandon (see below), with concerns over how the Martin Seligman’s optimism test, and the Personalization dimension of explanatory style. The test seems to encourage us to not take responsibility, and instead blame external events/people. Here is a quote from Dr. Seligman’s book to help answer Brandon’s concern:

I am unwilling to advocate any strategy that further erodes responsibility. I don’t believe people should change their beliefs from internal to external wholesale. Nevertheless, there is one condition under which this usually should be done: depression . . . We want people to change, and we know they will not change if they do not assume responsibility. If we want people to change, internality is not as crucial as the permanence dimension is. If you believe the cause of your mess is permanent, you will not act to change it. If, however, you believe the cause is temporary, you can act to change it. If we want people to be responsible for what they do, then yes, we want them to have an internal style. More important, people must have a temporary style for bad events- they must believe that whatever the cause of the bad event, it can be changed.

According to Seligman, we should use the external explanation only in situations where we are at risk for depression. Additionally, the Permanence dimension (temporary/permanent) is the key to change, not  Personalization (internal/external).

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What does it benefit to man if he gains the entire world, but loses himself?

-Jesus Christ

Social programming is the set of instructions each of us learned to fit in with society. Our family members, school teachers, and peer groups were all part of the socialization process. The long-term affect of this socialization is that we seek external approval and external goals in our lives. If we are to take control of our consciousness and pursue our own goals, we must learn to break free from social programming:

Caught in a treadmill of social controls, that person keeps reaching for a prize that always dissolves in his hands. In a complex society, many powerful groups are involved in socializing, sometimes to seemingly contradictory goals . . . Schools, churches, and banks try to turn us into responsible citizens willing to work hard and save . . . merchants, manufacturers, and advertisers to spend our earnings on products that will produce the most profits for them . . . gamblers, pimps, and drug dealers . . . promise rewards for easy dissipation- provided we pay. The messages are very different, but their outcome is essentially the same: they make us dependent on a social system that exploits our energies for its own purposes.

-Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Flow

Society tries bribing us at every opportunity. People who submit completely to social programming, and mistakenly believe that their happiness is obtained only by achieving external goals, are “rat racers” who never enjoy the present moments of life.

Do you constantly delay gratification to the future? Are you always looking to others for approval, and setting external goals? If so, your social programming is being used against you:

Ways Your Social Programming Can Be Used Against You

Money- “I want to be rich”

• Falsely believing that you will be happy when you make more money
• Becoming a workaholic to make more money

Status- “I want to be popular”

• Falsely believing that “once I obtain status, people will like and respect me”
• Trying to “keep up with the Joneses”
• Becoming popular with lots of people, but not building close relationships with individuals

Approval- “I want to be liked”

• Working at a job you hate to pay for your family’s high consumption
• Pursuing a career path that Mom or Dad told you to go after
• Not speaking up at work when you have a good idea, for fear of getting shot down

Power- “I want to dominate”

• Using others only as a means to achieve your goals
• Trying to one-up others, dominate conversations
• Pinpoint other people’s weaknesses and failures

How to Break Free from Social Programming

The key to breaking free from social programming is not to eliminate all external goals. Instead, it is to create goals that are meaningful to you personally, and then enjoy the day to day process of realizing those goals. Here are some tips for breaking free-

1) Choose your own values, principles, and goals

To assume responsibility for choosing our values, principles, and goals, relying solely upon our own reason and understanding- to honor our internal signals to that extent- is to practice the ultimate form of intellectual independence, the one most difficult for the overwhelming majority of human beings and for which their upbringing has least prepared them.

-Nathaniel Branden, Honoring the Self

It’s easy to adopt external goals that society gives you- after all, those are the goals you were programmed to adopt. It’s more difficult to create your own set of values- this requires intellectual independence and aloneness from society.

2) Follow your own vision

You follow your own vision by moving forward with your own personally selected goals, and not letting any external circumstances circumvent who you are. Following your own vision can leave you feeling alone in the world, and requires courage. But the more you are able to become independent and think for yourself, the higher your own self-esteem will be.

3) Accept your aloneness

You must accept your aloneness in order to truly be free of social programming:

We can learn from one another, but we cannot share the act of being conscious or of thinking. We can share the results- namely, our thoughts and perceptions- but consciousness, awareness, thinking, reasoning is, ultimately, an individual, solitary process, not a social one. And many people dread independent thought and judgment precisely because of this factor of inescapable aloneness; it makes them aware of their own separateness as living entities; it makes them aware of the responsibility they must bear for their own existence.

-Nathaniel Branden, Honoring the Self

4) Be honest with yourself

Here is a poem which emphasizes being honest with yourself:

The Guy in the Glass

When you get what you want in your struggle for pelf,
And the world makes you King for a day,
Then go to the mirror and look at yourself,
And see what that guy has to say.

For it isn’t your Father, or Mother, or Wife,
Who judgement upon you must pass.
The feller whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the guy staring back from the glass.

He’s the feller to please, never mind all the rest,
For he’s with you clear up to the end,
And you’ve passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the guy in the glass is your friend.

You may be like Jack Horner and “chisel” a plum,
And think you’re a wonderful guy,
But the man in the glass says you’re only a bum
If you can’t look him straight in the eye.

You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years,
And get pats on the back as you pass,
But your final reward will be heartaches and tears
If you’ve cheated the guy in the glass.

-Dale Wimbrow

Note: The word pelf in the first line means “wealth.”

Breaking Free is a Life-Long Process

Your genes instruct you on what feels good and bad, and society bribes you on how to expend your energy. To take control of your consciousness, you must be fully aware of social and genetic programming, and make yourself independent of it as much as possible. By taking control of your consciousness, and following your own vision, you will become better at thinking for yourself and more independent of others.

Breaking free is a life-long process, not a one-time effort. But I promise you, based on my own personal experience- the quality of your own life will improve drastically when you begin the process of breaking free.

Part of the Breaking Free Series

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Genetic programming is the set of instructions each of us was born with. It gives us instinctual drives such as fight-or-flight that are meant to motivate us toward activities which ensure our survival. In modern day society, if we are to take control of our consciousness and pursue our own goals, we must learn to break free from genetic programming:

Submission to genetic programming can become quite disastrous, because it leaves us helpless. A person who cannot override genetic instructions when necessary is always vulnerable. Instead of deciding how to act in terms of personal goals, he has to surrender to the things that his body has been programmed (or misprogrammed) to do. One must particularly achieve control over instinctual drives to achieve a healthy independence of society, for as long as we respond predictably to what feels good and what feels bad, it is easy for others to exploit our preferences for their own ends.

-Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Flow

People who submit completely to their genetic programming, and mistakenly believe that anything which feels good equates to happiness, live by the maxim “seek pleasure and avoid pain.” They are constantly trying to fill their genetic drives in the present, while ignoring the long-term consequences. They are also easier targets for societal organizations that take advantage of an individual’s instinctual drives.

Do you respond predictably to what instinctually makes you feels good and bad? Are you constantly seeking pleasure and avoiding pain? If so, your genetic programming is being used against you:

Ways Your Genetic Programming Can Be Used Against You

Fight-or-Flight- “React to perceived threats”

• Getting stuck in “survival mode” due to excessive stress at work
• Having an argument with your spouse, resulting in stress

Food- “It tastes good”

• Overeating
• Using food as a form of self-medication due to being unhappy with your life

Sex- “It feels good”

• Constantly being preoccupied with sex, distracting you from your personal goals
• Using pornography, strip clubs, or prostitution as a form of self-medication due to being unhappy with your life

Drugs and Alcohol- “It feels good”

• Needing alcohol to let loose and have fun at social events
• Using drugs as a form of self-medication due to being unhappy with your life
• Getting your fix by frequenting bars, liquor stores, or drug dealers

How to Break Free from Genetic Programming

If you cannot resist what feels good, tastes good, or control the way you react to perceived threats, you are not free to direct your consciousness towards the path you choose. You are living your life without taking conscious control of it. But there are some easy habits you can adopt to change the way you respond to genetic programming-

1) Use mental rehearsal to practice taking control of your consciousness

Spend 20-30 minutes a day mentally rehearsing situations in which instinctual drive is taking control- this is when you are reacting to things that taste good, feel good, or responding to perceived threats. In your mind’s eye, take conscious control of the situation, and respond in a positive manner.

For example, if you tend to overeat during meals, mentally rehearse yourself at a restaurant, eating a reasonable portion of food, and leaving the rest, or getting a to-go box. But don’t stop there- mentally rehearse every possible situation in which you need to take control. Visualize yourself responding positively to all sorts of possible scenarios, such as friends bringing snacks to work, or going to a buffet restaurant. You are practicing your self control, the same way a sports player would practice before a game.

You may start to think your time is being wasted, but give this a try for at least a week and you will be surprised. This is because you are tricking your mind- you will begin to notice that it will be easier for you to take control of yourself when the actual situation occurs. Your brain cannot actually tell the difference between mental rehearsal and reality. Keep this up for 21 days and you’ll find yourself much closer towards having complete control of your genetic programming.

2) Create a mantra to use whenever you lose control

Repeat a phrase to yourself every time your genetic programming would typically take control. For example, if you normally get stressed out when you have a lot on your plate at work, you can use the mantra “I’ll handle it.” Then, whenever you feel your muscles get tense and feel yourself slipping into survival mode, repeat the mantra to yourself “I’ll handle it.” Like mental rehearsal, this is a way of tricking your mind. On a subconscious level, your mind will believe your mantra, and you will distract yourself from the typical stress response.

3) Stay in control by staying accountable to yourself and close friends/family members

Find a way to track your progress, such as a daily log showing how many times you took conscious control over your genetic programming. After a month of progress, reward yourself in some way. For example, if you made progress by no longer using alcohol to self-medicate for a month, reward yourself with a nice dinner (note: if you are an alcoholic, I recommend you begin attending AA meetings as a support group).

Tell close friends and family members about your goal of taking control. Make sure you only tell those friends and family members which have been supportive of your personal growth in the past. Otherwise, instead of keeping you accountable, they may hold you back. After you’ve told your supportive friends/family members, ask for their help in keeping you accountable.

Breaking Free is a Life-Long Process

Your genes instruct you on what feels good and bad, and society bribes you on how to expend your energy. To take control of your consciousness, you must be fully aware of social and genetic programming, and make yourself independent of it as much as possible. By taking control of your consciousness, and resisting instinctual drives, you will be free to direct your energy towards the path you choose.

Breaking free is a life-long process, not a one-time effort. But I promise you, based on my own personal experience- the quality of your own life will improve drastically when you begin the process of breaking free.

Part of the Breaking Free Series

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• Breaking Free from Social Programming

You have many preconceived notions about what you want from life. These include survival needs programmed by your genes- food, sex, and fight-or-flight. These also include desires programmed by your society- to be well liked, rich, and attractive. If you embrace these needs and desires, you may be lucky and be the perfect fit for your time and place in history. But what if you aren’t so lucky? And whether or not you are lucky, is embracing these needs and desires the best use of your energy?

You must learn to break free from social and genetic programming in order to truly take control of your consciousness and follow your own vision. This two-part series covers-

Breaking Free from Genetic Programming

Breaking Free from Social Programming

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